Resolving Existential Angst Through Lemonade: Black Women Are

Won’t let my freedom rot In Hell.
Imma keep running ‘cuz a winner don’t quit on herself.

– Beyonce

yes
Beyonce smashing binaries and car windows

Before we begin asking questions about who we are, we are told who we must be. Confined to simplistic binaries, we the Black women of the world are told that we can only be what whiteness is not, we can only be what masculinity is not. At the end of this short piece, I want every Black woman to understand herself not in relation to men or to whites, but in relation only to self existence. Womanhood is not the opposite of manhood. It is not a means to balance the world. Blackness is not the opposite of whiteness, it is not all that whites fail to be.

On the contrary Black womanhood does not necessitate a definition that relies on our oppressors for existence or for relevance. Nah. We, the Black women of the world, we just are.  Continue reading

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Stand Up For Yourself Girl, Men of Quality Support Gender Equality Anyway

Alif Laam Meem MuslimFraternity
Alif Laam Meem Muslim Fraternity

Let no man convince you that you will only be deserving of love after you have stifled your soul to cower under his big boot.  I mean this sincerely and earnestly when I say: you are beyond foolish if you sacrifice self-sufficient, dignified personhood for a dictator you will also call a husband. Many Ghanaian women, especially heterosexual women, are so afraid of being unmarried that they’re willing to trade in dignity for partnership. It is a major reason why women are anti-feminist: the fear that it will destroy their dating lives and their prospects of marriage. I cannot say that I blame them, after all marriage is so emphasized for women that unmarried women are treated as worthless. Even though women should not seek men’s validation, it is a widely circulated myth that women who become feminists are shunned collectively by men. Sure,  gutter niggas sexist men find feminist women to be repulsive, but quality men dey. If a man is anti-gender equality, why would you want to partner up with him anyway? Why would anyone want to be with someone who does not understand that women are equal in dignity, social standing, intellectual capacities, value etc.?

It seems to me that what Ghanaian women desire is love. However, inherent within any loving relationship – that is worth keeping – is respect. Deep respect. Deep respect and love, cannot co-exist with sexist and domineering attitudes. Sexist and domineering attitudes are not reflective of quality men. We all deserve quality partners; the kinds who resist injustice and stand in defense of our personhood by supporting systematic gender equality, also known as Feminism. Continue reading