For Colored Girls Who Depended on Women Feminists When Men Feminists Were Grossly Inadequate

 

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Sometimes women deserve respect
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Sometimes they don’t. As a man, you have the luxury to choose if women get to be worthy of respect today.

I write this essay absolutely heart broken. I am at my wits’ end. The power of socialization defeats me. And I reluctantly recognize, that only women will want women’s freedom as badly as a person suffocating needs to take a breath. At the end of the day, the destructive power of sexism is merely an intellectual exercise for men. For men, it is witnessing someone else’s mistreatment and deciding whether to ignore, support or undermine it. For women, it is waking up everyday to live in a world where you are presumed to be less. Less rational, less equal, less emotionally stable, less economically viable, (have) less political power, less social standing, less brilliance, less respect, less pay, (be) less capable, less strong, less sexual, less less less. And those few men who claim to have made a commitment to re-orient the world, so women fail to be treated as less, are unfortunately less than inspiring. Nonetheless, the fight for equitable societal conditions moves on, as I write this essay to detail 6 habits that leave me clinging to my sisters for support.  Continue reading

Using Men As A Financial Plan Is Justified In A Sexist Society

A picture of rapper M.anifest
A picture of rapper M.anifest / Disclaimer: I am NOT calling Manifest sexist or accusing him of holding these views. Credit: https://instagram.com/p/3Jzx29w3cU/?taken-by=manifestive

The only time that sexist men care about the systematic disenfranchisement of women as a function of gender, is when they are negatively affected. I have to clarify, that while pictured, I am not calling M.anifest sexist. I have to clarify because the fragility of masculinity will have men crying, defending their reputation as “good guys” over addressing the institutionalized political, economic, and social marginalization of women in Ghana. Back to my post: repeatedly, I hear men whine over having to economically provide, without addressing why such gender roles exist: patriarchy. It is the root of a social system that divests in women’s education, denies women equitable access to jobs, and disseminates widespread ideas that indoctrinate woman to believe  that heterosexual marriage will be their greatest achievement. Essentially, in a patriarchal society where women are reduced to men’s domestic helpers, where women are confined to the home and expected to labor in that space, where women’s economic power is continually dismantled with rampant discrimination, using men as financial mobility becomes a learned means of survival. It is patriarchy, that seeks to reinforce a social order where men dominate women by granting men economic power, and leaving women as dependent on men for survival. Thus, men (and all persons) displeased with the normative ideas that require men to care for women financially, should seek to take apart patriarchal economic distribution, or shut the fuck up  rather than resent women and complain.  Continue reading

Rape By Another Name: Coercive Sex In Ghanaian Society

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In civil and criminal law, we call this false imprisonment. In everyday world we call this predatory scum behavior.

When you live in a society that teaches men that their sexual satisfaction is more important that women’s well-being, sexual coercion becomes normalized. As the picture indicates, many men in Ghanaian society are comfortable engaging in dirty tactics that seek to break women’s will, rather than create a safe, secure, and comfortable setting for consensual sexual activity to occur. The result of which is the gender based sexual double standard. While seemingly harmless, sexually repressed double standards for men and women create a toxic climate conducive to women’s exploitation. Continue reading