Here at Ghana Feminism we wish a Happy Father’s day to all fathers. You are trying your best, and we appreciate it. Here are 5 reasons why Feminist molds of masculinity allow for Better Parenthood.
1. Fathers are More Than An ATM
We encourage fathers to be viewed as more than just a source of economic resources. Fathers are also parents. Often times patriarchal gender roles leave parenting, in the home, to mothers and provision of resources, outside the home, to fathers. Fathers are expected to solely go into the work place to provide for their kids. Leaving out all the closeness that comes with what we imagine as “mothering” style of parenting. It’s inevitable, the more time one spends with their child, the more opportunity they have to know that child and become closer. Fathers should be valued despite their ability to provide money to their kids. Rich or poor, fathers matter too.
2. Fathers Should Change Diapers Too !
Fathers care about cleanliness of their children. Fathers are (and should be) persons that care and support the best interest of their child through positive, up-close and personal child rearing tactics that include feeding, changing diapers, showering/cleanliness, playing with children, emotional closeness etc. Unfortunately, artificially assigned gender roles often leave such duties to mothers exclusively. From what I’ve heard of parenting, changing poopy diapers is the awesome,
not-always-fun, aspect that builds closeness.
3. Paternity-Leave Please
Self-explanatory, but fathers deserve to work in family friendly settings where they can take time off work to bond with their newly born or adopted children. Yes cisgender fathers may not physically have the baby, but it is necessary that they are available both mother and child to care for them during this hectic time ! Capitalistic models of labor that require workers to put careers before their families are yucky! Paternity-leave rocks.
4. Mothers Aren’t Inherently Better Parents
The myth that there is something inherent about being a mother that makes women better equipped to care for children, while men do their thing outside of the household, bites men in the ass when it comes to custody hearings. Good parenting is a skill set that one develops with time and exercise. The pressure placed upon mothers to be perfect and self-sacrificing is unfair to women and men. Men who are very invested in the development of good parenting skills may be shunned and receive little social support. We as a society seriously need to shun these gender roles and let parents flourish.
5. Fathers Who Aren’t “Tough guys” Are Better Equipped To Attend To Emotional Needs
Not everyday pretend to have the emotional dexterity and mood of a serial killer, sometimes embrace your humanity and your varied emotional states men. Patriarchal masculinity is killing men by presenting an emotionally barren life as the norm. However, because feminism seeks to challenge this traditional, limited understanding of masculinity, men have more room to be freed from the burden of pretending to not feel 86% of their emotions. Not repressing your emotions means more space for emotional health. Good emotional health means better parenting and more bonding with your children.
Enjoy your day guys !